“Criticism is something we can avoid easily by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing”
So, some gimp ripped apart your new drawing. That's all good, Like muscle, it needs to tear apart so it can fill that gap and get bigger and stronger. Where do I get these analogies from?
The worst thing is when you know they aren't giving you criticism, but rather they are just being small minded spiteful jealous cocks. Ah well, like I say- always ask yourself why they have said and done such things, often they show themselves up.
So on to the real critics, the ones that are not doing it through spite, but because 'they' see fault.
Chillax for a bit before you speak.
If you respond straight away you are more likely to unleash a torrent of knee-jerk reactionary abuse. Do yourself a favor and count to 10, or in my case wait till tomorrow or just walk away from it. You need to remember that they are either trying to help or that they are just jealous knob ends.
Take both praise and criticism evenly.
Don't go thinking that praise makes you a hero, people are cool, praise is cool, but don't go celebrating over it. Some people are just positively amazingly ace people and will give you praise because, yes your work is good, but much like the shitty comments reflect negative people, awesome comments reflect that persons nature to just be awesome and say nice things
A great benefit of this is you become a bit like a zen warrior monk kung fu legend!! you do! You will be able to deal with both negative and positive in much the same way and it will stop you being a slave to those responses.
Just because no one loves your high brow dog portrait, it wont stop you drawing them, it wont make you decide to chase love by doing goopy neon skulls.
Eventually you will stop needing external praise and acceptance and find solace inside yourself. See! zen kung fu wisdom dude!! BUT, the caveat of this is that you shouldn't become an arrogant twat who ignores everyone's good, helpful advise when it is offered. Know anyone like that?
If you see that it is some jealous prick who cant draw for shit and leaves shitty 'criticism', you must just smile and leave it well alone, no point it getting upset over talentless fools (see 'evil people' thread below). Also worth checking out my Ego thread to help with this.
Look hard at what they say
Instead of wanting to pound their faces in to a bloody pulp with the blunt end of a bottle and stamping on their throats till they are dead then waving their crudely severed head around on a stick....you should try to evaluate what they have said and why they have said it. ask them:
- Why do you think 'this sucks balls mate'?
- How, in your infinite wisdom, think I can improve it?
- Is there a way to solve this problem?
If they cant answer them or their answers are utter bollocks then you know they are one of those peanut penised persons. But if they can help you and do see how to fix the issues then they are your bestust buddies. well maybe not bestust but you have turned a shitty thing into something great.
Don't be so bloody selfish
Sometimes people just lash out because they have no friends or they feel insecure or they have nagging feelings of knowing through and through they will die alone because they refused to stop being a prick.
What I mean to say is that its not always personal, don't take it as an attack on you and your being but rather a passing comment by some guy who is already either pointing out flaws in other peoples work or leaving spiteful comments on others.
Remember that they are the ones with a problem- leave them have it.
The best revenge is to look after yourself
I read that on some kids myspace about 4 years ago and remembered thinking it was so true- so remember to be well rested, sleep enough, work hard, play, have fun, eat good food, relax and learn to forgive and love people, and mostly learn to love yourself. Do good things for people, learn to be humble and use that as a measurement of your character.
Big man on campus eh?
My mate says this before he tears someones head off in the pub. He is a small guy and you wouldn't think he was such an vicious little bastard.
People often act big on forums and behind a computer- more often than not in real life people are usually a lot calmer and tamer and wouldn't be so crude and abrasive. The interwebs afford people a lot of protection. In real life 50% of the time they would hear 'oooohhh big man on campus eh?' before they had a personal, physical and up close encounter of the knee jerk reactions we just talked about avoiding.
So anyway- a quote to finish off:
“A man interrupted one of the Buddha’s lectures with a flood of abuse. Buddha waited until he had finished and then asked him, “If a man offered a gift to another but the gift was declined, to whom would the gift belong?”
“To the one who offered it,” said the man.
“Then,” said the Buddha, “I decline to accept your abuse and request you to keep it for yourself.”
Simply don’t accept the gift of a criticism. You don’t have to. Then it still belongs to the person who offered it.
have any of you got any tips of this nature or good stories about this sort of stuff?